MEN’S / RADIAL / TRUE TWIN
Class, I’m here to educate you on the six different mating forms of the indigenous Gorilla Bat on Planet TooToo. You might ask, why this is important. It’s a giant ape with wings. Just blast it with a standard issue M808 Magic Wand and turn them into cute little bunnies which we can donate to the orphanage.
Well, that may be true for the Gorilla Bats in dimensions one through eight. But Planet TooToo is in an alphabet dimension. None of that rookie numbered stuff for you Special Forces. Now as you know, there are only two alphabet dimensions that we know of—Alpha and Omega. Everything in Alpha is on endless three-second loops; it’s like the entire dimension is made up of independent gifs. And everything in Omega is reverse oriented, moving backward towards it’s beginning. So, like, when you turn left, you’re really turning
right and going the long way around.
Now, what does this all have to do with you boys and the Gorilla Bats? That’s a good question. I have no idea. The M808 might not be able to transmogrify alphabet dimension GorBas into bunnies but the M808-EX sure can! You can blast them no matter which mating form they're in, too! Since Planet TooToo is in Omega, you just have to remember to point the M808-DX at yourself before you zap or you’ll end up hexing yourself.
Dammit Corporeal! Did I say to practice that right now? Am I talking backwards? Do we look like we’re in Omega?? Leary, please help Kleps to sickbay and see if he can get those bunny ears removed before we leave.
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