CAPiTA Horrorscope - 2020

HORRORSCOPE
MEN’S / RADIAL / TRUE TWIN

Class, I’m here to educate you on the six different mating forms of the indigenous Gorilla Bat on Planet TooToo. You might ask, why this is important. It’s a giant ape with wings. Just blast it with a standard issue M808 Magic Wand and turn them into cute little bunnies which we can donate to the orphanage.

Well, that may be true for the Gorilla Bats in dimensions one through eight. But Planet TooToo is in an alphabet dimension. None of that rookie numbered stuff for you Special Forces. Now as you know, there are only two alphabet dimensions that we know of—Alpha and Omega. Everything in Alpha is on endless three-second loops; it’s like the entire dimension is made up of independent gifs. And everything in Omega is reverse oriented, moving backward towards it’s beginning. So, like, when you turn left, you’re really turning
right and going the long way around.
Now, what does this all have to do with you boys and the Gorilla Bats? That’s a good question. I have no idea. The M808 might not be able to transmogrify alphabet dimension GorBas into bunnies but the M808-EX sure can! You can blast them no matter which mating form they're in, too! Since Planet TooToo is in Omega, you just have to remember to point the M808-DX at yourself before you zap or you’ll end up hexing yourself.
ZZzzzzAAAAPPP!!
Dammit Corporeal! Did I say to practice that right now? Am I talking backwards? Do we look like we’re in Omega?? Leary, please help Kleps to sickbay and see if he can get those bunny ears removed before we leave.


Team ridden and team designed, the Horrorscope is must-have deck for your quiver. It is fun, maneuverable, easy to ride, and capable of big things. With a big reputa-tion and a modest price, the Horrorscope remains one of the most sought-after urban and park boards in the game. Featuring a throwback blunted shape with a shorter tip and tail for decreased swing weight, the Horrorscope allows you to size down without losing any performance. Always evolving, the Horrorscope series has been upgraded for 2019 with a new durable SuperDrive™ EX base.

RIDER TYPE: THE URBAN AND RAIL RIPPER THAT WANTS
MAXIMUM PERFORMANCE AT A MINIMUM PRICE

FLEX: 4

CAMBER TYPE: NEW! PARK V2 PROFILE
These versatile boards feature a dual reverse camber Flat Kick freestyle shape. A zero camber section throughout the insert area provides a stable skate-style feel, while elevated contact points turn on a dime and float effortlessly in powder.

TECH:

FSC® CERTIFIED SELECT CORE™
Poppy lightweight core with no irregularities or finger joints for uniform flex and consistency.

SPECIAL BLEND FIBERGLASS
MAGIC BEAN™ RESIN

Custom weighted Biaxial top / Biaxial bottom = increased strength and durability. Impregnated with reformulated, high performance plant-based MAGIC BEAN™ RESIN.

NEW! SUPERDRIVE™ EX BASE

The new standard in sintruded base material, this versatile running base is precision forged for high abrasion resistance and a super smooth glide.


• Multitech™ Level 4 DeepSpace™ Silkscreen + PAM16000™ Topsheet
• Sublimation Base
• 360 Degree HRC48 Steel Edges
• Full ABS1000 Sidewalls
• Bitter End Deflection Tuning
• Stainless Steel 4 x 2 Inserts